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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

# Book Review # Debbie Pokornik

Book Review: Break Free of Parenting Pressures


Summary from GoodReads:
Have you ever wondered how parenting can be so fulfilling and yet so overwhelming? Have you ever dealt with your child's behaviour and then had to fight off the guilt and uncertainty as to whether or not you did the right thing?

Many parents experience regular battles with self-doubt, frustration, and fear that they are damaging their kids for life. In Break Free of Parenting Pressures, author and parent educator Debbie Pokornik discusses how you can throw off these shackles-recognizing you have what it takes to do a good job and allowing your inner wisdom to shine through.

Break Free of Parenting Pressures discusses:

• Insights into why you parent the way you do
• Secrets to help you understand your family
• Ideas for building strong relationships with the important people in your life
• Suggestions for strengthening your parenting strategies
• Techniques to help you relieve stress and increase your pleasure in being a parent

Parenting will always be challenging. Let Break Free of Parenting Pressures help you decrease your concerns so you can enjoy this time and blossom as a family.


My Review: This book is full of things I've been telling fellow parents for years. It's great to see that it's finally in print.


I think a great part is a little area she has that she lists things that weaken relationships {threats and intimidation, yelling, etc} and things that help to build strong relationships {kindness, listening, sharing, etc}. I've had a little memo on one of my fridges for years now. It details positive versus negative behaviors within my home. It applies to BOTH the children and adults who enter.

Of course, with the book, there are things I agree with and things I don't. But you're going to find a difference of opinion on anything relationship or child related. Also, sometimes what works within one home will not work within another. If you try some of the methods and they don't work, NEVER be frustrated. It's only that one method wasn't working. You can try different forms of it or experiment with your own ideas as to what works within your home.


For example, my home will never be a quiet home. If you are opposed to noise, you most likely shouldn't visit me. I've never believe children should have to keep silent. They're only children once and they should enjoy that time. There's plenty of time for responsibility and jobs and cleaning. I've always tried to allow mine to enjoy their time as children. Therefore, I don't feel my children or my home should have to *alter* to accommodate my visitors. They should accommodate my home and children if they are visiting me.


Back to the book, there are some really great things in here. In one instance Debbie mentions accidentally calling home while in a rush to get her children somewhere. She said she could not believe the tone of how she had spoken to her children when she heard herself on voice mail. I think a wonderful activity would be to allow your children, on random days to have a surprise recorder that you don't know about. Then play it back. See if you really are the parent you want to be and the one that you should be.

Debbie also stresses in this book that there is more than one way to get your child to be agreeable. Experiment with those ways rather than becoming frustrated. The more positive we are as parents, the more positive our children will be with us.

When they're children, it's our chance to make or break our relationships. I truly feel the end result of how close you are as adults reflects on how you were as they were growing up. My mom was a terrible mother. We, to this day, do not speak and I'm happy of that. The one thing I did learn from her, is how NOT to treat my children.

I recommend all parents pick up this book and read through it. No one is perfect...NEVER. It simply won't happen. But we can always snag up new ideas and improve ☻

Remember: we aren't perfect and neither are our children. Just learning this will decrease our amounts of pressure drastically. Mistakes will happen, and "I'm sorry" really does go a long way.


This book is broken up into 4 parts for easy future reference.


RATING: ♥♥♥♥

Pages: 264
Softcover

Review copy of this book provided by the author/publisher in exchange for a fair and honest review. In no way did the provision of the book affect the outcome of my review.

2 comments:

  1. Thank you Mystee for taking the time to read the book and relate it back to your own thoughts and strategies. Your home sounds fun...mine used to be the sound of kids building forts, playing pet store, etc - now it's teenagers music, gaming...you get the picture. Still isn't quiet and I still love it! Thanks again for your review.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This sounds like a great book. I'm going to be checking for it at Borders on my weekly trip.

    ReplyDelete

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